So I am going to talk about things that I am scared of. One thing is that I am scared of snakes. This reptile is not my cup-of-tea at all. If other people are scared of geckos or spiders, mine are snakes. Although they are also real-life “snakes” (hahaha), the animal snakes are what I am afraid of.
I am also afraid that I would forget something that I am currently working on/doing that may cause harm to others. Of course, sometimes I can be an overthinker but I have a reason because of my disease. One of the symptoms of my disease is mind fogs/forgetting things and it really is a hassle sometimes. Sometimes I forget where I put my cellphone, what I am gonna do next, what to say next in a middle of a conversation etc. Even certain memories of my past or simple words (recently, the word Zonrox), I cannot remember unless I search for it. So I am afraid like certain thoughts of “what if I forget turning off the stove and may cause house fire? what if I forget taking care of my baby niece in the middle of a babysitting” I shared these thoughts to my boyfriend and he said that I should make a to-do-list so that I would be constantly reminded—in which I will be doing na but how I about words and memories that I have difficulty remembering? Things like that make me anxious and shake with fear.
Another thing that I am afraid of is when people that you are comfortable with especially when they know your imperfections all too well (not necessary my boyfriend but true friends and some family too) will (God forbid) suddenly leave you for good. I understand that some people leave in a certain period of their lives to experience more and I have no qualms on that. We all have people in our lives that we outgrow and that’s a fact. I respect the silent departures in my life (adulting, maybe?). BUT there are some specific people (the few chosen ones that have huge impacts on me) that are a NO-NO if they suddenly leave without saying a damn word. I can foresee the heartbreaks.
a walking random 